Healthy marriage habits: what are they?
Woah. Life is intense! You’re stuck in the fast lane, expected to do hundreds of tasks daily. You’ve mastered – well sort of – more like you’ve become accustomed to juggling home and work life. Then you toss in continuing to work on your marriage, it gets overwhelming. What normally takes a backseat to this chaos? You guessed it. Your marriage. It is unfortunate and heartbreaking because your spouse is one of the most important people. They deserve it, and so do you.
Let’s change those unhealthy habits – some you may not even realize - and learn what healthy ones are. It is easy to fall into a routine of not putting any effort in. When you’re ready to make changes, bring your ideas to your spouse.
Healthy marriage habits: what are they?
You want to start improving your marriage, but where to start? You may find creating healthy habits to be quite challenging in the beginning. That is normal and perfectly okay. It’s because you’ve fallen into the routine of unhealthy habits.
Remain calm and discuss any conflicts. Shut down, leave the house, or raise your voice when a conflict arises? None of these are appropriate, healthy responses. Stay, take a few minutes, and then talk. Discuss your feelings, what you would like to see change, and come up with a plan.
Daily check-ins: Set time aside every day to give your spouse your full attention. Discuss how they feel, what they are doing, and any news they’d like to share.
Active listening: When your spouse is talking with you, use active listening to comprehend what they’re saying.
Date nights: Important to stay on track with your connection. Date nights offer just this! Keep it interesting, find new adventures. Or keep it familiar with your favorite spot. Both ways, you win.
Space. What? We are already feeling short on time together, why should we have space? Keeping your own identity is important. You both need to enjoy time as individuals, to reset and recharge your batteries. Do something you enjoy on your own or meet up with your friends. Remembering who you are as individuals will create a happier, better version of yourself to bring into your marriage.
Counseling. Just like a car, your marriage can benefit from a tune-up. Have a few appointments, there’s nothing to lose. Only knowledge, connection, and improvement to gain. If you decide counseling isn’t for you, that’s okay too.
Compliment. Try a few compliments every day and see the improvement with your connection intensify.
Say hello and goodbye. Always. Make it more than a quick hi. Take the time to look them in the eyes, have a conversation, and kiss them.
Put the phone down. Keeping up with the latest and greatest becomes second nature with your phone attached to your hand. It is damaging to your relationship because your spouse never truly has your full attention.
Affection. This one can be challenging, especially if you have different love languages. Affection will naturally grow your connection and closeness. Touch their leg when watching TV. Hold their hands when shopping. Bring it back to when you were dating, remember never stop dating each other.
Keep it up
Don’t give up when it gets hard, it takes practice, just like learning any new skill. Keep in mind that setbacks are normal, they happen. Don’t let it discourage you, just get back on track.
Have fun – create healthy habits to start working on!