Dating

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Cocktails for the Heart

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Looking for a simple thing to do for a date night with that special someone?Depending on your romantic state of mind, mixing up drinks in a variety of reds and pinks can be delicious. If you decide to add chocolate, then things may get a little more intense between you and your date. The best thing to do first, is to think about presentation and then a romantic name for your cocktail creation. The goal is all about setting the right mood. You can go for super cute, sexy, sophistication or something that matches your personality. 

In the end , a beautiful serving tray is a nice touch. It can actually transform your specialty cocktail into something romantic and elegantly sweet. If that’s not cute enough, try presenting the drink with a decadent dessert. 

 Feeling creative? Dare to mix the following cocktails below:

Love Potion Martini

  • Ice

  • Sweetened lime juice 

  • Strawberry vodka 

  • Cranberry juice cocktail 

  • Grenadine part 

  • Strawberries for garnish, optional

INSTRUCTIONS

  • In a cocktail shaker with ice, sweetened lime juice, strawberry vodka, cranberry juice cocktail, and grenadine. Shake vigorously until combined.

  • Strain love potion cocktail into a martini glass. Garnish with strawberries, raspberries or other red fruits

A Sweet Kiss Sangria

  • 1 cup cherries pitted (fresh or frozen)

  • 1 cup strawberries sliced

  • 1 cup blueberries

  • 1/2 cup brandy

  • 2 cup cherry-pomegranate juice or cherry-cranberry juice

  • 2 tbsp of powdered sugar

  • 750 mml red wine of your choice

  • 12oz of lemon-lime soda, optional

INSTRUCTIONS

  • In a large sangria pitcher, combine cherries, strawberries, blueberries, brandy, cherry-pomegranate juice, and powdered sugar. Pour in red wine and stir gently. Feel free to add the the lemon-lime soda as well. 

  • Chill sangria for at least two hours before serving. If you waited to add the lemon-lime soda, add it to the pitcher and gently stir before pouring

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Are love potions real?

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Love potions

Learn about pheromones.

Depictions of love potions can be found in movies such as Hocus Pocus and Harry Potter or on websites that cater to men and women looking for love. If love potions were real, there would probably be more happy couples, not to mention low divorce rates. So, is it possible to create a scientific version of love? Personally, I believe the answer is “No”. In my opinion, love is an action that is linked to a person’s behavior, emotional well-being and experiences. I don’t believe there’s a recipe in the form of a drink or pill to help a person find love. However, a friend of mine boasted recently about a chemical found in various products that could possibly cause the opposite sex to fall for you. Long story short, she was single and now she’s married. True story. 

The chemical is a hormone called pheromone. According to experts, it stimulates a part of the brain that is responsible for our emotional state. It’s believed to increase our feelings, even sparking an immediate attraction for some couples. That said, I decided to look into it, not for myself though. Disclaimer: I am married. Anyway, what I have discovered is that there are oils and perfumes on the market with the chemical hormone known as pheromones. 

I’m not sure of the success rate but if you’re single, I guess it’s worth a try. 

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The common sense dating approach....

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Have you ever dated someone who thought a "no show" or a "text without a response" was no big deal to get upset at or angry? Well, I have and even to my surprise I accepted some of his creative excuses but mostly because the guy seemed to have pretty legit reasons as to why he was a "no call , no show."  So all was forgiven most times.  However, it wasn't until stranger things started to take place that I started to raise my eyebrows.  

The man I was dating started canceling dates on me, and one time even shared that he had some "random " male friend come visit him from out of town. Everyday that this friend was suppose to leave, there was another reason why "he" was still there . Any man that's not strong enough to give you the courtesy you deserve is simply not worth your time. I'm glad that this man showed me who he was sooner than later especially before we made anything official. Real men are consistent, have conversations, and are not afraid to be vulnerable. 

So when all else fails, just use the common sense approach to dating. If it doesn't feel right then it's not right. 

Here's a list of things NOT to ignore:

1. He places phone "face down" and ringer is always on silent

2. He's a serial text "deleter"

3. He's creative with excuses

4. He's always "too busy"

5. He opts to "text" instead of "calling you"

Yes, it's common sense but how many of us are guilty of not using our better judgement. Date on and date smart. 💋

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Companionship means Compromise

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It's easy to fall in love with the illusion of being in love. The kind of love where you experience nothing but butterflies in your stomach, playful touching, giggles, and the world feeling as if it's standing still when you're with that special someone. Those are all great feelings.

As women we sometimes date and immediately start imagining life with that one special interest who seems simply irresitable. That may not be you but I was 100 percent guilty of behaving this way. Those romantic movies don't help and neither does social media. There's always a friend posting engagement or anniversary pictures with that serious facial expression as if the couple is gazing into each others eyes. "It's sickening," I often think. Well, not really. I'm just overreacting as always but you've seen these pictures on your timeline at least once.

It's really easy to believe that relationships are filled with joy and that you're missing out on life if you're a single woman. The reality is if you allow yourself to get caught up, you may find yourself spending the rest of your life with the wrong person. All because you were pulled into the illusion of being in love and relationships that appear fairytale like on social media.  I have several friends who settled but are currently in unhappy relationships.

Today, I too am a married woman and I often hear my single friends complain about life and being alone. I get it because it can be a bit depressing when you walk into an empty house or don't have someone to share a crazy idea with when it pops up in your head. I can name more but the list of things we dislike doing alone can go on and on. However, instead of naming those things, I rather introduce you to two words, patience and compromise.

It hit me not long ago that I am not good at comprominsing. In fact, I can be selfish at times. Everything is mine, mine, mine. Ten years ago, all I was focused on was a significant other while not correcting myself in the wrong. I'm also impatient and want things fast. I know being this way isn't right which is why I encourage single women to take their time when they date. I truly understand that "Give me a ring" attitude because that was me. However, a single friend recently sent me a text that resonated. We barely talk but she's been determined to find love. The text read, "Name the easiest and hardest thing about marriage." I replied with two words. Companionship I named as the easiest and compromise as the hardest.

Limited patience and compromise aren't problems for every single woman because in some cases women compromise the wrong things like integrity and more. However, the recent text certainly made me think that we sometimes focus too much on the easiest part of relationships which is companionship when we ultimately should be working on ourselves, learning how to compromise the "right" things in order to endure challenges while creating healthier relationships.

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5 signs you've mastered single life

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1. You're great at cooking for one. A pinch of this and that..... Dinner is ready.

 

2. You're extremely comfortable going to the movies alone. Who's paying attention besides it's dark in the theater.

 

3. You're good at ignoring sweet talk! Why? Three words. Confident. Smart. Resilient.

 

4. Just about every Beyoncé song empowers you. #Lemonade anyone?

 

5. "Good Morning" texts don't phase you... You're single not desperate.

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Always protect your heart.

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Always protect your heart.  That doesn't mean keep your guard up but pay attention to signs. I dated a man before who I'll call Mr. Rumor.  Why? The reason is simple. This man had many secrets and there were so many rumors circulating around about him that I didn't know what to believe.  Everything from Mr. Rumor being married, divorced and possibly gay. 

To me, the most difficult thing about a rumor is, it may actually be true and could have some validity to it. I will never forget the day I laid my eyes on Mr. Rumor.  He would tell me how much he cared for me, how I was different, and how he wanted to be with me and only me. One night while out with my girlfriends, I learned there was a lot more to Mr. Rumor.  Apparently some of my friends were familiar with him. I eventually started to replay some of the conversations that we've had in my head, eventually questioning him and the friendship we had developed. In a matter of no time our relationship faded because I started to ask questions. I guess making it difficult for him to lie and pressuring him to clarify the rumors. To date, there are still many rumors lingering around about him. 

However, I did learn a valuable lesson from that encounter with Mr. Rumor. The lesson is now a part of my dating 101 rules. I strongly advise women and make it a point myself to always ask questions and never settle. 

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Maintaining a smile

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As a single lady I always get a little choked up because I'm always single during the holidays. Well except for my birthday since it always falls on Thanksgiving weekend.  I have been blessed to always spend my “born” day with my closet girlfriends, and they make it a blast. This year for my birthday we decided to enjoy karaoke and hookah, and it was definitely a fun time. However, as the night came to a close my reality started to sink in and weigh heavy on my mind.  I have never shared my birthday with anyone of the opposite sex. No I didn’t wake up to any special texts or birthday calls.  Instead, my smile was brought on thanks to my family and friends who always go out of their way to make it memorable.

Let’s start with my family, my grandma has made it a tradition to always sing the traditional birthday song to me and my grandpa makes it his business to create a special card on his computer every year, which I save and have framed by the way.  Unfortunately my heart breaks as I sit at the long and elegant table prepared with “Thanksgiving” favorites because there’s no one special sitting next to me.  Then there’s Christmas.  Now don't get me wrong, I love my family and very thankful for them but I would love to have a significant other to share the holidays with. I can’t help but dream of what it is like to exchange gifts with someone, or tell them how much I appreciate them or blow out my candles with them on my birthday. I long for the day that my dreams become a reality.

For now I’ll just continue to maintain my smile and try to enjoy my single status.  ‘Tis the season to be jolly and thankful. Until Mr. Right and I cross paths, my goal is to make sure my life is in order so I can be just right for that special someone! I take comfort in knowing that I won't be alone during the holidays and my birthday forever.

 

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